All the Moments I Can Get

I know that I'm just going to end up hurting more then before, but even so...

I hope I can make you feel that no matter what, your loved by me and that someone out there is always thinking about you. Maybe there may be a day when lightning will even strike twice.

The fact is though, that because I love you, I just have to protect you from making poor choices, even if I want to make them with you. Probably also protecting myself, but then again, maybe I'm OK with being venerable.

Every message and phone call is so precious; I value every one. Every moment I steal away, those glances, and even the brief moments when I share your touch, its still electrifying after all this time.

Even so, all I can do is sit back, see what you do, and ensure that if you ever wanted to try again, I'd have the logistical capability to do so. I miss telling you that I love you...

Holes... In and Around Me

The person I love came home this last week. Unfortunately, is not one of those joyful occasions, because every time I look at him, I see the man I fell in love with. There's an unspoken understanding between him and I though, as our lives are diverging, but nonetheless... you can still wish it were different.

If only I had said the right things a year ago...

I have the strangest feeling of piece about it though, because it doesn't feel like this is the end. But this is the way things are for now. Sadly, he loves someone else very much, and I can't ask him to leave that nor would I really want to. I just need to know that he's happy, and maybe even know that I can be too.

I suppose I'm doing exactly what I can, which is to keep the dialog going.

Maybe when I reflect a bit more, I'll gain some more clarity.